Political(ly incorrect) Map

Warning: the following might offend you, and if it does that is probably the point, so consider yourself disclaimed. And if you can't take a joke or laugh at blatantly obscene stereotypes that may or may not be true than you take your ability to not be amused way too seriously. The most disgusting thing about the map in my opinion? Iceland gets off way too easy.

Rich Whitey for Governor!

Rich Whitney, a long shot Green Party candidate for Governor of Illinois now has an even longer shot. An error at the Chicago Board of Elections will cause Whitney's last name to be misspelled as "Whitey" on some touch screen ballots this November. Of the 23 wards affected by the typo, half of them are largely African American districts. The error cannot be fixed in time for election day. Now black people will have the option of voting for "Rich Whitey" this Fall. Good luck, Rich.

From Whitey, uh, Whitney himself:

“I don’t want to be identified as ‘Whitey.’ If this is happening in primarily African-American wards, that’s an even bigger concern,” Whitney told the Chicago Sun-Times. “I don’t know if this is machine politics at play or why this happened.”

The state that gave you Blago now gives your "Rich Whitey." The gift that keeps on giving.

Read the full story from a far superior blog here.

Speaking of WTF...

This image (from the NYTimes) is of our two beloved (depending on who you ask) leaders at their weekly appointment. A couple of questions come to mind for me:

1. Why do they appear to now be a 70 year-old couple who have been married for 45 years?

2. Is Biden really texting under the table instead of rapping with his boss? (great mid-meeting move)

3. They really only have a meeting once a week? Does anybody know what a VP actually does. I mean Cheney pulled strings and sent us off to two wars and Biden eats his own shoe a lot...so a weekly meeting is enough?

Anyway, someone PLEASE answer my questions.

Democrats Using Reefer to Cultivate Young Voters

In what could be a great idea or a sign of desperation, Democratic strategists are deciding whether or not to push marijuana initiatives on to ballots for the 2012 elections. According to a WSJ article today, Democratic candidates in California are benefitting from a surge in enthusiasm from young voters eager to support Proposition 19, which will legalize Marijuana in certain quantities and allow local governments to regulate and tax it.

The article states that ballot measures typically do not increase turnout on a large scale, although strategists from both parties argue that certain ballot measures can activate targeted groups of voters which can impact a close election. Democrats liken the reefer measure to the 2004 ban gay marriage effort Republicans lead in Ohio and other battleground states as a way to attract the more conservative vote for President Bush.

We'll see if this makes any sort of difference. I think it sounds difficult to just slap a marijuana initiative on the ballot in any state. The states that will have an initiative on the ballot likely lean enough to the left that it won't make a difference (The Dems are munsoned right now so maybe it will). The Democrats are definitely dangling the joint in front of those young voters. What would be funny (kind of) if it backfired. There are definitely a lot of 19 year old Republicans who love weed but feel they've been around long enough where they can be a xenophobe and complain about their taxes. Full article here.

UN General Assembly Gets Off To a Rocky Start

Shocker...Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, said some crrrrrrazy shit to kick off the annual General Assembly yesterday.

Here are the high points:

The United States orchestrated the Sept. 11 attacks to rescue its declining economy, to reassert its weakening grip on the Middle East and to save Israel. (Ahmadinejad)

33 delegates walked out on him in total. I'm confused why we keep putting this guy in front of a mic. He's the same dude who has vehemently denied the holocaust.

Why Politicians Shouldn't Talk About Sports

Or in this case, at all. Jesus, Tom Menino, do you really have to butcher everything when speaking? This is embarrassing. Not that Menino is the only Massachusetts politician to quickly prove that his/her affection for local sports culture is pure political bullshit. John Kerry, while campaigning for President in 2004 said his favorite Red Sox player was "Manny Ortez" (yes pronounced it Or-Tez), Martha Coakley who got destroyed by Scott "I'd eat myself if I were chocolate" Brown, in the Mass. special election, said that Curt Schilling is a Yankees fan. Oh, and Scotty also wondered if the Buffalo Sabres were from Washington DC. Granted these politicians have a lot more important things to think about, but they should realize that the best way to a Sully's heart is through a basic knowledge of local sports. Anyway, watch Menino in the video below. I'd like to give him credit and say half of this is being spoken in some sort of exotic foreign tongue but unfortunately it is just munsoned English.

More Sports Viewers Vote Republican

Interesting survey done by National Media Inc. examining the correlation between sports fans viewing and voting habits. From the survey release:

Researchers at National Media Inc., a GOP firm, analyzed survey results from a total of 218K interviews between Aug. '08 and Sept. '09. The polling was conducted by Scarborough USA, a joint project of Nielsen and Arbitron, the 2 top ratings agencies in the country. The data helps TV and radio stations and the country's newspapers set ad rates by evaluating viewership habits.

GOPers are most likely to watch the PGA Tour, college football and NASCAR, according to the study. But if GOP ad buyers want to reach more frequent voters, they should focus on the PGA; golf fans told researchers they were much more likely to vote than NASCAR fans say they are. Meanwhile, Dems hold the largest advantages among basketball fans, both those who watch the NBA and the WNBA. And fans of World Wrestling Entertainment are also much more likely to favor Dems -- if they vote. Wrestling fans are less likely to cast ballots than any other sports fans.

Most of these results seem pretty logical. Read the whole release here (DATA!!!). Thanks to Thom Weekends for sending this along.

Paragraph of the Day

From Thomas Frank's opinion piece in today's WSJ.

It is tempting to understand the tea party movement as a distant relative of the lowest form of televangelism, with its preposterous moral certainty, its weird faith in markets, its constant profiteering, and, of course, its gullible audiences.

Read the full piece here.

*This is not an implied stance on TCD's view on the Healthcare issue. However, we will take advantage of opportunities to make fun of any fringe group that embarrass a political party, Democrat or Republican. PETA, you suck, too.

Tickle Fight Follow-Up

Eric Massa sounds like a major weirdo. Luke Russert is also pretty funny when talking about Massa doing "weird naked things."

We Want to Scare You and Then Take Your Cash

The Democrats are easily rippable, but the 'douche of the week' award goes to the RNC and their strategy presentation on giving. Strategy #1? The fear card - nothing new to those who paid attention during the past administration. Politico obtained a copy of a confidential RNC fundraising presentation which outlined their plan of how to get donations from wealthy, "ego driven" donors and those they can scare in to giving. The slide below, one of about seventy, displays the key marketing techniques i.e. fear/negativity towards the current administration (Socialism?) or being on the 'Wall of Fame.' What can they do for you? Well, that can be found in another slide deck.